The Self

It's a long weekend here and all I have done is lay in bed and cry. My boyfriend of 2 and a half months has been avoiding me for the last week and a half. What is up with men anyways? I understand that he has been busy with work, I understand that he is tired. But what I don't understand is what happened to that sweet, affectionate guy who was so warm and caring in the beginning. Where did he go? I keep going over what I may have done to push him away but I am coming up blank.

I started reading the book Shift Happens by Robert Holden and in it he says "The fear that something is wrong with you is your greatest block to joy. In truth there is no other block". If this is true then I am completely responsible for the things that are in my life. I am responsible for this relationship going wrong. He also points out that there is no separation. He quotes Albert Einstein as saying "Separation is the great illusion". There is no time and space between you and God. He also says "Separation is the great disease of mankind." His premise is that because we believe that we are separate and alien to the rest of life that we experience lack, struggle, pain, conflict, and illness.

He may have a point, it's pretty tough to trust someone when you feel as if they don't belong to you or your life. So with 6,000,000,000 people on the planet how can we ever feel alone? How can we feel lonely if we don't allow anyone into our lives and into our hearts?